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Sometimes I'm tempted to think that I'm the only one whose child misbehaves and does this or that or the other.
As I talked with a few friends recently, we shared a couple of parenting struggles and ways we were trying to encourage and grow our children.
It reminded me that often I just see the outside of other families, the side that looks so put together with well-dressed, polite, obedient children. And maybe sometimes that's all they see of us.
But I dare say that in the hearts of those moms and dads are struggles similar to mine. Am I doing this parenting thing right? Should I discipline for this offense or show mercy? Will every one ever get along for more than a few minutes? Am I going to mess up my kids forever?
It's encouraging when a trusted friend or family member says, "Hey, I've been there," or Hey, I'm there now!" It lets me know that this particular behavior I'm dealing with from a child is not new or revolutionary or unusual. Other kids do the same thing; other parents grapple with finding a solution.
The best part of our conversation was realizing that we all shared a desire to rear our children for God. It's not about who looks best on the outside, but what is the state of our children's hearts. There may be times - especially at the ages my girls are now - when they're feeling their way and figuring out their place and learning to stand on their own.
I offer our children my love and bathe them in prayer and...trust. That word I'm focusing on this year, remember? I can trust God that as I ask, He will give me wisdom and grace, and when I mess up - forgiveness.
Oh, yes! I enjoy hearing the struggles that other people have with their children, not because I enjoy the fact that they're struggling, but because it shows me that I'm not alone. And I'm always grateful to remember that God's grace is new everyday, and with Him, I can do this parenting thing.
ReplyDeleteOh, most definitely not just you. There is nothing easy about parenting, especially when you desire to do it well. We need God and we need community for this all important task.
ReplyDeleteBoy, does this hit home today!!! My precious, school-loving, teacher's pet, academic superstar daughter has been acting up in school a little the last month. :-O I was gutted to get her less-than-stellar behavior report. (Talking & giggling to the point of distraction) :'( I don't know if she's starting to push tween boundaries or what, but I am SO THANKFUL I can ask my friends for advice and ESP. their prayers!!! (Pray for us!)
ReplyDeleteYes - I will pray for you!! You do have a precious daughter and I know that God will give you wisdom to help her with this!
DeleteTHANK YOU SO MUCH!!! ♥
DeleteThe older my kids get, the more I'm realizing that being in constant PRAYER for them is the greatest parenting tool I can enlist.
ReplyDeleteMy 5 year old is the most energetic, rambunctious, strong willed, frustrating, yet loving and thoughtful child you'll ever meet. I've had way too many negative comments about her strong-willed and independent, persistent personality. I'm in constant prayer for her, because I know God can use those traits as spiritual strengths if she will let Him :)
While I never like reading other parenting struggles, it does help to remind me that I am not in this alone, my kids are not the only children who misbehave, and that yes we will make it past this stage!
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